Black Friday

My hatred is not for Black Friday in and of itself, but rather for people with strong feelings towards it. Actually that statement is also misleading because I myself have strong feelings about it... I DON'T CARE.

Let's assume for a second that I choose to spend my day off sleeping in. Oh no! I missed out on all these great deals! There is no way I can possibly go on living knowing that I didn't get 20% off the 3rd season of Quantum Leap on DVD! Who the hell cares?! Yeah, I know it's completely outrageous to believe that someone might find it more rewarding to stay curled up in a nice warm bed on a chilly morning snuggled up with someone they don't get to spend enough time with instead of standing in a line getting frost bite for a chance to throw elbows into an old ladies gut trying to beat her to that last half off cappuccino maker. And just for the record it is possible to choose to opt out of the madness because you want to, not everyone who makes that decision does so because they "just don't know how much fun it is".

Now once again let's assume that I really really did want that 3rd season of Quantum Leap on DVD and get up early to go get it for 20% off. Oh my goodness! I'm participating in a tradition that supports American consumerism! How can I possible sleep at night knowing that I'm such a pawn of capitalism?! Who the hell cares!? How many facebook status's did I see the Friday and Saturday after Thanksgiving with snide remarks about how sad it is that people chose to participate... how fucking condescending can you be? Woohoo! You spent one whole morning not buying things... do you want a gold star for your superior moral character? And for the record you're stupid if you don't realize how hilarious it is that you talk about "those people" who participate in this "capitalism debauchery" and then in the next sentence brag about the fantastic sale you found on the shoes you're wearing. I guess I didn't get the memo that sales are good except for one morning of the year when they're evil. Money in the system is money in the system... sorry to burst your bubble.

So seriously, go shopping or don't. I don't care. I'll go shopping or I won't. It's stupid for you to be concerned.